(belated) Triple O seven

Hi Everyone!!
I'm here.
I've been meaning to write since last friday - the day before Triple O-7. I thought it was a fantastic name for a blog (given that the date was going to be the 7th of July 2007, or 07-07-'07... and double O-7 was HOT - so I heard)..
but alas, I didn't have a moment to write and sadly it wont come around again......
well.....
ever.
sigh.
anyways. it was a good day. I hung out with SJ and we went to the beach!!!
that's right - BEACH~!!!~
because I now reside in Barbados, the beautiful Island in the Sun ("willed to me by my father's hand") (none of you know that song, probably - but it's like our official island song - the not-quite-national anthem).
things with me here are going well. I'm have a moment to write because i'm at the library waiting for my sister. yes - the library - but just so we're clear - I now work at the library - so I get paid to spend all my time here - it's pretty sweet. :)
I have few funny library stories. but right now I'm in more of a reflective mood. so I will reflect instead. Tomorrow I'm throwing a thing at the beach. It's in an effort to see as many familiar faces as possible. I haven't been seeing a whole lot in the past month and I'm starting to feel it. Tomorrow is a significant day because it happens to be the anniversary of our graduation from Secondary School - so I've extended the invitation to the entire class (though I only called about 15 of the 135 - haha!). It's also a significant day for me - because it's kinda like my birth-day... or rather, my life-day.
It's the day I felt..... "alive - for the very first time" (sort of)
that was actually an entire year to the day before my graduation day. That was the day I found myself to be in love (for the very first time). That was exactly 7 years ago to the day.
I write it out now because - well - because it's no longer a "special day sacred only to me" (and him sorta). I write about it because so much has changed and it's time to move on. (I almost wrote sorta again in brackets - but no, this time the moving on has to be complete.)
There were sweet moments, such sweet moments. I hope everyone of you reading this post has been in love at some point - because it can be *Sweet*.
I've been reading over my old journals. The first time we told each other "I love you" I grinned for the rest of the week - I even did jigs for no reason on the way home from church, I was perfectly ridiculous.
I learned so much. I grew in ways I never imagined I could grow. But I think the biggest lesson I learned had to do with fear. I used to be so afraid to love completely - and rightly so - it's a powerful thing and a very vulnerable position to be in. but this is what John says on the matter

18There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. (1John 4:18)

So when I read this I thought that the fear would go away. But instead I had to learn to give it away - To God. He is the one that loves us perfectly. And what's more, I had to learn to give it away as many times as it came back - because it did come back.
So, I'm glad I learned that. I'm glad I grew in that. I don't regret a moment of it.
I hope you are well my friends. I'll let you know how tomorrow goes (when I possibly see him - for the first time in 4 years...we'll see how well I've moved on..)
I love you all.
I miss you.
tulip